Remembering our beautiful boy, Kossi (Jan 10, 2001 – Feb 22, 2013)

For those of you who know me personally, you will probably know that we had to euthanize our 12 year old yellow lab Kossi today. This post is in his memory.

We let our Kossi go today. After a 3-year fight with canine lymphoma, Kossi finally won. He successfully completed 2 series of chemotherapy treatments and this week his blood tests indicated that everything was back to normal. But sadly, he fell to a condition called laryngeal paralysis, a condition that made it very difficult for him to breathe – a condition that presented life-threatening symptoms for which there is no viable treatment, given his current state of health and age.

It has been a very difficult week as his condition worsened. The danger was that his larynx could close completely. It could collapse and he would not be able to breathe at all. This would be a true medical emergency. After all he has been through, that is certainly not the way we wanted him to go out. We talked to a surgeon this week about performing a procedure that might be able to help, but given the risks we decided that we just couldn’t put him through that. We did not want him to suffer. So, we made the difficult decision to let him go.

Kossi was a remarkable dog. We have had many dogs, and we will continue to have dogs in our home for as long as we are able to care for them. But, Kossi was the best dog ever. He has earned that title and he will carry that emblem with him forever and always. He had an incredible spirit, a streak of stubbornness balanced with a desire to please, and a joy for playing with his ball. He loved to play fetch and was obsessed with balls of all shapes and sizes. I remember our first walk with him. It was over 10 years ago, but I remember it as if it were yesterday. We walked him on the path alongside the basketball court and soccer field near the Herndon Community Center. There were kids playing catch, a soccer game and a basketball game all going on simultaneously. He saw balls being thrown and bouncing everywhere on that first walk with us. His eyes got huge when he saw balls flying through the air. He actually looked up at me and I could tell that he was thinking; “Now THIS is heaven.”

Kossi has been a very, very sick dog for nearly three years. But he always rose to the occasion. He always accepted his treatment. He never growled when poked or prodded. He endured blood tests and intravenous chemotherapy and more. He always greeted the technicians and doctors at the Hope Center with a wag of his tail. And he obediently went off with them, knowing he would be poked and prodded some more. He loved his acupuncture treatments, because they were done in the comfort of his home, in his living room, in familiar surroundings. He would settle in to those treatments and would often fall asleep while Jody held him. Unfortunately, we reached a point this week where there could be no more treatments because there was nothing more to do.

They say that a dog will tell you when it is his time. And for the past year, I often looked for those signs. I asked Kossi, “Are you ready to go?” And of course he could not answer. But recently, I noticed that he no longer wanted to go into the Hope Center. When we went in for tests or treatments, all he wanted to do was go home. And over the past week, when we took him for walks, all he really wanted to do was to turn around and to go home. He’s home now. And it was his time.

I cannot imagine what it will be like to wake up tomorrow and not have him there with us. I cannot imagine not walking him. Not feeding him. Not making food for him. Not playing ball with him. Eventually, all we will have are his pictures and their memories. But, we know that he is no longer in pain. We know that we no longer have to worry about him. All that we have to do is to keep him in our heart and love him forever. And with a dog like Kossi, that is a very easy thing to do.

Dogs are our best teachers. We humans think of ourselves as being so superior. But we’re not. We may be at the top of the food chain, but we’re nowhere near the top of the developmental chain. Dogs and animals really know how to live in the moment. Humans can only aspire to that. Dogs only know unconditional love, and humans put too many conditions on love. Dogs love simplicity. Humans make things complicated. Dogs love to play fetch, but humans think it is too trivial. At the end of the day, dogs really love a good belly rub. And humans just think that is way too invasive. Ah, we have so much to learn and I will try to learn from you Kossi. You have been one of my greatest teachers.

Jody and I want to thank our friends from all over the United States and across the world who have held a good thought and who have sent Kossi loving, healing energy. He received Reiki from all over the planet! You blanketed him with love, and I am convinced that this loving energy was just as important to his healing as the cutting edge medical treatment he received. And there are not enough kind words that I can write to thank the doctors and staff of The Hope Center for Advanced Veterinary Medicine in Vienna, VA. They apply medicine with such personal care and heartfelt love. Every staff member there in the Oncology Department is an angel on Earth.

Rest easy buddy. Love you sweet boy! Sleep well my friend. You are our best dog. You are our best boy. You are our Kossi boy. And we will always love you.

An affirmation for self-healing

I start every session with my clients with this self-healing affirmation:

• Give yourself permission to be here today.
• Give yourself permission to be cared for.
• Give yourself permission to be nurtured.
• Give yourself permission to be loved.

Give yourself the gift of massage and schedule your next appointment with me today.

5 things I have learned about women through my work

I am a certified massage therapist, Intrinsic Coach®, and Reiki Master in private practice near Washington DC. For the past 6 years, my work has focused exclusively in the area of women’s wellness and trauma recovery. This was not a path I intended to travel when I decided 8 years ago to leave the corporate world and pursue life as a massage therapist and coach. Rather it was the path that was presented to me when I discovered energy work – polarity therapy, cranial-sacral therapy, Reiki – and a wide range of Asian forms of massage and bodywork, all of which see an inextricable link between body, mind and spirit.

I have had the honor of working with over a thousand women in the past 6 years – all of whom sought me out in an effort to heal, to cope with the lingering effects of trauma and chronic pain and to reconnect their spirit with their bodies. Many came to me with physical complaints, but through the process of working together, they discovered that emotional healing can also be achieved through a sensitive application of what I call a “body-centered” approach toward healing and recovery.

There have been many tears shed when together we discovered that place within your body where you have held the pain for so long. But, our sessions have been a safe harbor, a sacred place where your experiences have been honored, a place where there is no judgment for expressing emotion or shedding tears, a place where it is ok to be cared for, to be nurtured, to feel the infinite love of the Universe.

Each day, I learn something new from my clients; working with you has spawned tremendous personal growth in me, and for that I am grateful. But, I have observed what I would describe as common patterns or threads among all of you with whom I have worked. And, I would like to share those lessons with you today in the hope that you begin look at bodywork and massage in a much broader context. It is a physical medium for sure, but I believe that all bodywork is a spiritual act first and a physical act second. When you are fully and deeply connected to your body, you cannot help but be connected to the earth and to the greater universe.

So, I give you these five observations with the full knowledge that they will be supplanted by new learning as I work with some of the most amazing women whom I have ever met – my clients. They inspire me every day and I am so very grateful that I have the opportunity to share in their transformation.

Try as you might, it is very difficult for you to receive
As I begin each session with my clients, we start off with a few minutes of stillness and quiet. She is lying face down on my table and I will gently place my hands on her – on in the small of her back and the other in the middle of her back and then near the crown of her head. I ask her to take in deep breath and envision the breath coming up from her root chakra, and then I ask her to just focus on her breath for a few minutes, breathing slowly in and slowly out.
I will than say, “Give yourself permission to be here today . . . Give yourself permission to receive.”

For almost all of my clients, this is one of the most difficult things for them to do. The inability to receive is something I see in my clients every day. My clients are all busy women – many are mothers who are trying to balance the demands of a career with the needs of raising a family and children. They are constantly in a give, give, give mode, which while having its’ rewards, often leads to lack of sleep, increasing levels of stress, fatigue and often illness. I see resentment and anger building within them as they continue to go on giving. I try to remind them that if they continue to write checks on their “giving accounts,” it is mandatory that they make a few deposits into it from time-to-time!

Receiving is a skill and it is something that can be learned. Receiving is its own reciprocal action. You do not need to immediately return the favor of the gift. Your acceptance is a gift in and of itself. When you receive you begin to recharge yourself, you make deposits into your giving account and make it easier for you to give to others.

There is time for everyone in your life but you
You always place yourself last on your list. Being a mom, a wife, balancing a career is more than a 24 hour a day job. At the end of the day, you are Dr. Mom, the primary caregiver, and Given your predisposition to give, give, give, it is very easy to simply drop your name last on your list. Oh, you’ll get around to it, but you rarely do.

Intellectually, you all know that it’s important to make time for yourself; time to exercise, time to rest, time that is just for yourself. But, it is just so darned hard because everybody comes to you for everything. You’re the family doctor, head chef, in charge of housekeeping and accounting, the family bus driver, CEO and more.
The fact that you’re on my table, once a week or once a month is a great start. But, it is not enough. So, where do you start?

You start by setting boundaries and (occasionally) saying no. Your family, your co-workers, your spouse, boyfriend or lover will not respect your time and ultimately you, if you don’t respect your time and set aside time that is just for you. Just. For. You.

You also start by re-training your kids, your spouse and even your co-workers. If they are old enough, there is no reason why your children cannot make their own lunches for school. The same goes for laundry and other household chores. If they don’t know how to do something, teach them. Your insistence on making time for yourself will also set an example for them. You’re not just teaching them how to live; you become a living example and you show them how to live.

Sadly, domestic violence and sexual abuse is more common than people realize
According to RAINN, every 2 minutes someone in the U.S. is sexually assaulted. 44% of the victims are under the age of 12. 80% of the victims are under 18. 97% of the rapists will never spend a day in jail. Domestic violence numbers are a little harder to come by, but surveys put the number at somewhere between 25% and 40%. Domestic violence ranges from verbal battery and abuse to outright assault.

When I started my practice, I was shocked with the realization that so many of the women who were coming to see me had suffered at the hands of men. At any given point in time, more than 50 percent of the women who come to see me have experienced some form of sexual assault or domestic violence. I was stunned by the number of women coming to me, and by the fact that they were coming to see me at all. I believe that the official numbers are actually low, because so much of this type of abuse goes unreported. But, I realized early in my practice that this would become a major focus, that it would become my life’s work.

The stories are chilling. I have a client whose father repeatedly raped her from the time she was 6 months old until she turned 7 when he tried to strangle her. She completely repressed these memories until she came to me complaining of neck pain. When I worked on her neck to try to relieve the pain, it triggered flashback memories of the event.

There is another client who stuttered and her father would repeatedly slap her in an effort to try to get her to stop. Those memories came back, when in the course of her massage I gently worked on her face. She too had repressed the memories and dissociated her feelings from her body. Another client was repeatedly gang-raped. These are just a few of the stories. I have hundreds more like them in my client archives.

The body captures these memories. Physical therapists call it tissue memory. It’s not a well understood phenomenon, but massage therapists see it all the time. I’ve written extensively about it on my blog. When an area injured during trauma (whether it is an accident, abuse, invasive surgery – which is also traumatic) is released, all of the feelings, emotions, and sensations that you experienced during the initial event may also be released. The same fear, the same pain, the same anxiety may resurface, just as intensely as when the original trauma occurred. At the subconscious level, this is what your body has been feeling all along. In order to fully heal, these sensations must be fully felt so that they can be released.

The bottom line is that I have learned that bodywork can help bring about emotional healing a well as physical healing. Body, mind and spirit are inextricably connected; they cannot be separated and should not be treated as separate entities.

A sensitive therapist, within the therapeutic environment, can help a client fully connect mind and body, and help the client to safely release the sensations associated with the trauma. It is only through this kind of release that you can truly heal. Unless you completely let go, your body continues to experience the trauma at a subconscious level. If the body doesn’t release, restrictions can form in the fascia, creating chronic pain and making it worse over time. The added stress on your body may also compromise your body’s immune system, which can lead to other forms of illness.
Within the therapeutic environment, and with a competent and sensitive therapist, you have the ability to release and clear the pain and trauma of the past. When we fully let go of the pain of our past, we can embrace life in the present, and experience the love and beauty of living in the moment.

So, what should you do if you if you are a victim of domestic violence or sexual assault?

If you are in immediate danger or if you have been hurt, call 911.

For advice and support: if you or someone you know is frightened about something in your relationship, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY, 1-800-787-3224.

For rape or sexual assault, contact RAINN (Rape and Incest National Network). RAINN is the nation’s largest anti-sexual assault organization. At any given moment, more than 1,100 trained volunteers are on duty and available to help victims at RAINN-affiliated crisis centers across the country.

To reach a qualified counselor for help, call 1-800-656-HOPE.

For a safe place to stay: Contact your state’s branch of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence or another local organization.

Even though you may not feel so, you are worthy of love, care and nurturing
Again, intellectually most of my clients would agree with this statement. But, it’s hard for them to walk this talk. So, how do you put this into practice?

It starts with a conscious decision to love yourself, to reduce (and eliminate) self-criticism, to forgive yourself, to let go of worry, to have fun, to receive, to be true to yourself and more. Everyday can be an exercise in building your self-confidence and self-esteem. Every day can be an affirmation of love for yourself and an expression of gratitude for the life you have.

There will be set backs. So, I try to help my clients set reasonable expectations. I am drawn to the Reiki Principles which start with the words, “Just for today . . . ,” and especially the principle that says, “Just for today, I shall be kind to all living things,” and I remind my clients that they are one of those living things and that kindness and love for oneself gives you the ability to love others.

Even though you may not believe it, you hold all that is necessary to heal
We are always in search of that magic pill. My clients are no different. They come to me, often with a specific pain, complaint or issue. And, at least in the beginning, they expect me to fix it. And I’ll try various healing modalities; massage in all of its forms, Reiki, Cranial-Sacral therapy, essential oils, diet, exercise and more.
My clients eventually come to realize that there is no “one thing.” What I have learned is that there is no “one thing” that if we all would do to make our lives perfect. No, instead I work with my clients to develop what I call their own personal “life cocktail.” It’s an ever changing combination of things, in varying proportions – from meditation and yoga, to exercise and diet, to massage therapy and energy work, to balancing work and life and play, to love and sex, to spirituality and seeking a higher order, – it’s all of those things and more, much more.

What I have learned is that you all are creative, capable and complete. You are absolutely perfect. When a client comes to see me, there is only one person in the room that matters, and that is she. She holds all the knowledge necessary to live a full and productive life, to be happy. It starts with a conscious decision, a desire for change.
What I have learned is that even though we may desire magical cures and modern medicine tries to create pills that will miraculously cure you, healing does not happen that way. It happens when, as my friend Dr. Lissa Rankin says, “we as practitioners hold sacred space, believe in our patients, love them, hold them up to the mirror to show them what we know is possible for them, and then make recommendations for how we think they might achieve the healing effect they desire.”

She goes on to say, “Science may cure, but only love heals.”

And that my friends, is the ultimate answer. That is what I have leaned over the past 6 years.

Lessons from the “Horse Whisperer,” Buck Brannaman

Outside of the horse training world and culture, Buck Brannaman is not a household name. But, within the field of “natural horsemanship,” he is a legend. He is the inspiration for the book and film “The Horse Whisperer,” and his work and life have been most recently captured in a stunning documentary “Buck,” directed by Cindy Meehl. It is probably an over simplification, but what Brannaman does when training a horse is to create a safe place for both horse and human; a place where they both respect each other so that they can achieve a true union.

The fact that Brannaman is able to do this work is nothing short of a miracle, in and of itself. As a child, he suffered horrific abuse at the hand of his father. The abuse was so bad that he and his brother spent years in foster care in order to live safely away from his father’s violent abuse.

It would have been easy for Brannaman to become an abuser himself. The roots of child abuse can often be traced back to cruel lessons learned in childhood. Instead, he found solace working with horses and made a conscience decision to live another way.

In the film “Buck,” Brannaman comes out and says that he has not been able to forgive his father. But, he also made a conscious decision to live his life in another way. He took that anger and fear he felt as a victim to become the ultimate survivor. “Abused horses are like abused children. They trust no one and expect the worst. But patience, leadership, compassion and firmness can help them overcome their pasts.”
Brannaman speaks to survivor groups today. And he sees a definite connection between child and animal abuse. “For me, these principles are really about life,” says Brannaman, “about living your life so that you’re not making war with the horse, or with other people.”

There are many lessons and inspirations I took with me after watching “Buck.” I was struck by Brannaman’s conscious decision to live in the “now,” to live in this moment, and move past the trauma of his childhood. But, he also has not dissociated from his abuse. Rather than holding on to fear and anger, he has opened his heart to love, and the heartfelt compassion he feels for horse and human has enabled him to move on and do the incredibly powerful work that he does today. I think most of all, Buck Brannaman’s story is one of “letting go.” If he can let go of the abuse he experienced at the hands of his father, then there is definitely hope for the rest of us.

The Guest House

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

~ Rumi ~

An affirmation for surviving and thriving

Every day, I am inspired by the clients with whom I work. This photo and quote describes them beautifully. Thanks to all of my clients for allowing me to be your massage therapist, your coach, your student. I learn from you every day.

Emotional Healing, Tissue Memory and Bodywork – What Happens and Why It is a Good Thing

Eastern medicine and thought have long ago made the connection between our body and our mind. Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) takes this idea one step further with the view that we are all connected to the earth and the surrounding universe. Most Native and aboriginal cultures recognize the mind / body connection as well as the deeper connection to the universe. Somehow we in the West fell off that wagon, and it’s only now that we’re trying to get back on.

In his groundbreaking book, “Healing Ancient Wounds – A Renegade’s Wisdom,” author John Barnes describes how injuries and trauma encountered in life affect our minds as well as our bodies. He describes how during treatment of the body, all kinds of feelings and sensations can be released. These sensations may include shaking, pain, tremors, and emotions. Barnes says that feelings are released by triggering what he calls “tissue memory.”

Our body responds to triggers brought on by our five senses: sight, smell, taste, sound, and touch. These are called “proprioceptive triggers.” Powerful images of tragic events such as those that occurred on September 11th, can bring you back to that moment. You may vividly recall exactly where you were and what you were doing. Songs or music may also produce triggers. For me, the old Glenn Miller classic “Moonlight Serenade,” brings me back to my wedding day. All of the emotions, the excitement of that first dance with my wife come flooding back to me. More than 20 years later, the images, emotions and memories associated with that song are still as strong as they were on the day I was married. And all it takes is a song!

Similarly, when fascia (the densely woven connective tissue that surrounds every muscle, bone, nerve, artery and vein as well as all of our internal organs including the heart, lungs, brain and spinal cord) is released through touch, tissue memory can also be triggered. What is especially interesting about fascia is that it is not just a system of separate coverings. It is actually one structure that exists from head to foot without interruption. As such, each part of the body is connected to each other. This is one reason why pain may occur in other parts of the body, away from the area of the original trauma.

When an area injured during trauma (whether it is an accident, abuse, invasive surgery) is released, all of the feelings, emotions, and sensations that you experienced during the initial event may also be released. The same fear, the same pain, the same anxiety may resurface, just as intensely as when the original trauma occurred. At the subconscious level, this is what your body has been feeling all along. In order to fully heal, these sensations must be fully felt so that they can be released.

In her book, “A Patient’s Guide to Understanding John F. Barnes Myofascial Release,” physical therapist Cathy Covell writes:

Fully feeling these sensations is easy to say, but not always easy to do. Remember that the sensations can feel as intense as they did during the initial trauma itself. Many times these sensations that occurred during the trauma were overwhelming, which is why we didn’t release them in the first place. One of our self-defense mechanisms that automatically take over when we are overwhelmed with pain, fear, etc. is to leave our body. What I mean is that we can become completely numb and stuff the pain and emotions. It can seem just as overwhelming when the tissue memory is triggered again.

A sensitive therapist, within the therapeutic environment, can help a client fully connect mind and body, and help the client to safely release the sensations associated with the trauma. It is only through this kind of release that you can truly heal. Unless you completely let go, your body continues to experience the trauma at a subconscious level. If the body doesn’t release, restrictions can form in the fascia, creating chronic pain and making it worse over time. The added stress on your body may also compromise your body’s immune system, which can lead to other forms of illness.

Within the therapeutic environment, with a competent and sensitive therapist, you have the ability to release and clear the pain and trauma of the past. When we fully let go of the pain of our past, we can embrace life in the present, and experience the love and beauty of living in the moment.

Massage Therapy and Cancer

As I write this post, a dear friend of mine is struggling with cancer. She has bravely fought the disease for more than 5 years now. So, my heart and healing thoughts go out to here as I type this. She has been a regular client of mine and I know that she has benefited from nurturing, caring touch.

There’s no doubt that cancer patients can benefit from massage therapy. In fact, bodywork can serve as a nurturing healthcare option during the stressful, doctor appointment-ridden time of oncology management.

“Cancer treatment places a heavy toxin load on the body, which massage can help eliminate,” says Gayle MacDonald, author of Medicine Hands: Massage Therapy for People with Cancer. “However, too much too fast may be more than the client’s body can comfortably handle. Skilled touch is beneficial at nearly every stage of the cancer experience, during hospitalization, the pre- or post- operative period, in the out-patient clinic, during chemotherapy and radiation, recovery at home, remission or cure, and in the end stage of life.”

The benefits of massage for these clients include improved blood circulation, equalized blood pressure, and help with fatigue and nausea. The place to start is by consulting with your physician and your massage therapist. For those who are two to three months out from treatment, bodywork that can be used includes lymph drainage therapies, trigger point therapy, neuromuscular therapy, myotherapy and myofascial release, among others. It’s better to wait before receiving deeper work.

While hospitalized, some appropriate techniques include cranial -sacral therapy, polarity therapy, Reiki and Therapeutic Touch. MacDonald says no matter how severe the treatment’s side effects, there’s always a way to administer some type of bodywork. According to massage therapist and former oncology nurse Cheryl Chapman, while it’s important to receive touch from a qualified practitioner who has worked with cancer patients before, “Touch is always appropriate–there isn’t anyone who is untouchable.”

If you or someone you love is battling cancer, consider massage as a therapeutic, nurturing choice to help navigate this difficult journey.

Living with Metta – Loving Kindness

I wanted to share a beautiful meditation that I received in an email from my friend Leah. Leah is also a massage therapist and she is one of the few therapists that I actually allow to work on me. Leah has also introduced me to the concept of “Metta.”

Metta in its simplest definition means “loving-kindness.” At a deeper level, it is an attitude of goodwill and compassion towards yourself and others. Leah learned about metta through her Thai Massage trainings and subsequent research on meditation for stress relief.

This is the meditation that Leah shared with me. And now, I wanted to take a moment to share it with you. It is one of the meditations that I use to begin and end my day. I find that it is a great way to have patience and compassion to approach day-to-day situations.

Replace the “you” with “I” to bring peace to yourself first before you can send it to others. Take two full breaths between each line and repeat if desired.

Metta Meditation

May you be Happy
May you be Healthy
May you be Peaceful
May you be Safe

With Metta,

Fred

Learning to Tango

I was walking with my wife and our dogs the other day when we passed the local fire station. There was a young firefighter / EMT outside and when she saw us with our dogs, she called out to us, “Come on over! We have dog biscuits.”

Our dogs love walking near the local fire station. The crews who work there are all very dog friendly, and rarely a visit goes by without our dogs getting some sort of treat. The other day was no different.

As we continued our walk, I mentioned to my wife that “if I had it to do over all again, I would seriously consider becoming a firefighter / EMT.” My wife asked me why, and I said something about how I thought it was a really cool profession and that they get to drive really big, cool trucks!

After we returned home, I tweeted the following from my Twitter account, “So, if you had to do it all over again, what would you do differently? I, for one, would become a fireman / EMT! What about you?”

I received some very interesting answers. My friend Kat replied that she would have loved to have studied abroad when she had the chance. Another person replied that they wish they had become a physical therapist. And yet another said that she wished that she had continued to dance and that she would love to learn to tango.

The tango remark reminded me of one of my favorite film scenes. You know the scene. It is from “Scent of a Woman,” where Al Pacino gives an impromptu tango lesson to Gabrielle Anwar. He asks her why she hasn’t learned to tango and she replies that she is afraid. Afraid of what, Pacino asks? And she replies that she is afraid to make a mistake. Pacino says, “There are no mistakes in the tango.”

There are no mistakes in the tango. I really love that. I think what he means is that when you submit to the seductive power of the tango, you become swept away by it. That seductive power overcomes fear. And when you overcome fear, you are not afraid of making mistakes. As Pacino says, “When you make a mistake in the tango, you get tangled up, and then you tango on!”

Fear of making a mistake is what holds most of us back. It keeps us tongue-tied when we try to learn a foreign language. It prevents us from trying something new or different. It holds us back from reaching our true calling. Fear of making mistakes sabotages our happiness.

My friend Lissa Rankin said to me that I could still become a firefighter if I wanted. She even suggested that the volunteer department in her town would welcome me with open arms, and that they also held the best BBQ party every summer! Now, I love BBQ a lot and it’s quite an incentive, but I do think I am pretty happy with my life right now. When I walked away from the corporate world 8 years ago to become a massage therapist and coach, I knew that I would make mistakes. But instead of fearing mistakes, I actually embraced them. Just like in Pacino’s tango, I knew that those mistakes would become part of my dance and that I would eventually glide through them. I would, as Pacino said, “just tango on!”

I’m very happy with all of the twists and turns my life has taken. I’m grateful for the incredible friends who grace my life every day. I know that on the long and meandering road called life, that I have “gone a long way out of the way, in order to come back a short distance correctly.”

But, I wouldn’t mind driving one of those cool fire trucks one day! And most of all, I really would love to learn to tango. So, I know I will. Someday, very soon.

I hope you enjoy this scene from Scent of a Woman as much as I do! And when you get tangled up in life, just tango on!

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